March 25, 2010
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Floating Cloud - Chapter 2
The end of the Vietnam War in 1975 had left its scars across South East Asia, and with it came a very real fear of a potential spread of communism. When we were ten, although the war had finished three years earlier, there was still a tense calm, even in Singapore. Cao Ping and I did not understand anything really of what the background was, and Vietnam was still far enough away for us not to worry about it. However, one late evening, as I was pouring Xi Ghong a glass of Scotch, he told me that war is never a good thing.
“We can never achieve happiness through violence. Never forget that.”
Words of advice, only Xi Ghong could give me, a small double standard I thought, remembering the beatings I would get.
“You are a floating spirit Fu Yun, and you will have to travel great distances to travel to fulfil your destiny,” he said, as though he were a fortune teller, “yet you must not succumb to violence, no matter what. Your spirit will not take it.”
When I was born, as my mother was unable to name me, Xi Ghong and Mei-Lee took me to a Buddhist temple where I was given the name Fu Yun - floating cloud. It was seen there and then that there was a spirit inside me that would be restless, one that would look for adventure, one that would always be looking for inner peace, no matter where it had to go to find it.
When Xi Ghong told me this, he talked about Vietnam, and what had happened there, as if he had been there himself, in amongst the bloody fighting, with the Americans pushing their noses in where they did not belong.
“They fought a half battle – they were not interested in giving all they had. It was nothing more than a token fight. Let Vietnam fall, it means nothing to them really.”
“Did you have Vietnamese relatives Xi Ghong?” I asked.
A sudden eerie silence fell about the room with my question. Until that time, I had assumed that Xi Ghong had also come from the mainland. He had never spoken about his childhood, nor about his parents. I just knew that they were dead. He had not told me anything more than that, and I knew better, until this point, than to ask anything about them.
“My grandfather came from the mainland, my grandmother from Vietnam. I have no time for the People’s Army. I am true Chinese, but everywhere the People’s Army goes, it leaves nothing in peace. And no one stands up to them – no one came to the rescue of Tibet either.”
Tibet? I had learnt about the march of destruction of Tibet in 1950, the desecration of holy relics in Lhasa and the fighting that had left thousands dead or dying, or fleeing to the safe haven of India. It was a lot later that I had a better view of what really had happened there, the gang-rapes, beatings and torture camps, with families being forced to beat their own in public “trials”. The shame for them, being embarrassed in front of the same people they had thought of as their friends just months previously.
It was estimated that over a million Tibetans were killed or tortured by the invading Chinese, with religion outlawed and 6,000 Buddhist monasteries and all the religious artefacts held therein destroyed. A complete culture with thousands of years of history was effectively eradicated within just a couple of years.
“Xi Ghong,” I said very quietly, “am I allowed to ask about this?”
Xi Ghong emptied his glass, gave it to me and instead of the usual gesture to take the glass to the kitchen area and wash it, signalled for me to refill it, with an extra splash. I could tell that this was serious conversation time.
Mei-Lee went out of the room to her bedroom. Xi Ghong told me that she did not want to be reminded of what had happened. The story he told me there was the most personal account of anything he had ever said to me. We never talked about it afterwards, yet he was moved by the whole history behind him and Mei-Lee. I knew better than to ever ask him to go through those emotions again.
When he had met Mei-Lee, back in 1930, there had been a lot of turmoil in China, and civil war was changing the face of China. The two opposing forces in the civil war temporarily stopped fighting one another and instead came together in 1931 to push out the invading Japanese. And when that enemy had been ridden and sent back to the land of the rising sun fourteen years later, China had once again renewed its old feud. After succumbing to the Communists of Mao Tse Tung in 1949, Chiang Kai Shek and the KMT Party retreated to the island of Taiwan, leaving the Communists on the mainland to become the People’s Republic of China.
“They have done nothing for the people of China, Fu Yun – only for themselves”, Xi Ghong said to me.
Xi Ghong did not go in to the details of how they arrived in Singapore, but they had had more than just a taste of the life under the communist regime and in the fight against Mao's conquest. He told me briefly about the People’s Liberation Army’s actions during the Cultural Revolution of the 1960’s, and the huge breach of Human Rights over so many areas.
“Tibet was probably nothing more than a way to gain face after the KMT left for Taiwan” he said. “Taiwan, Hong Kong, Macao – they are all part of the 'family', and the Chinese communists will fight all the way to ensure they do not ever lose face. For them, the honour of the Chinese people is at stake here. They will fight to regain their honour after having lost these jewels.”
“It is always a matter of honour with us Chinese”, I said. Xi Ghong looked strangely at me at that. “Everything we do comes down to honour.”
“Honour is gained, Fu Yun. Honour is won, but not with the gun. Not through fighting. The Buddhists of Tibet were interested only in peaceful life. They were not fighters; the Chinese were not honourable by fighting. Tibet was re-annexed into China. Buddhism teaches us that we need not fight with weapons, that peace is the sole way forward.
“My grandmother always told me that the Chinese would ruin Vietnam. She loved my grandfather with all her heart, but theirs was an arranged marriage. A question of honour for her – in previous times we would respect our Elders, Fu Yun. Today the respect is there, but it is a different respect. The world can learn a lot from the Chinese culture, but the Chinese culture also needs to learn from the rest of the world.
“It is no longer a time for force. It is a time for peace – our world is in trouble, our world…”
Xi Ghong broke off. I could see that he was fighting back a lot of emotion. I had never seen him like this, and would never see him like this again.
“Look at the Americans," said, regaining his composure for a moment, "pretending they rule the world, this arrogance of the West. Look at the Chinese, the Russians, the French, the Australians. They get involved in a war in Vietnam – it is not their war, but they make it theirs to fight, and then do not even have the honour to fight with dignity. Fu Yun, if you are going to do something, do it with your heart.”
With that, he punched himself hard on his heart, and a small tear escaped from his eye. Pretending not to notice, I got up and brought the bottle to Xi Ghong. Although he was getting redder in the face, I put this down more to the anger inside him than the Whisky.
“Xi Ghong,” I asked, “why do so many countries have to fight always?”
“Because they are brought up to think that force is power,” Xi Ghong said, pouring himself another glass of the imported Chivas Regal, “that force is respect. They command none of that – the power is the force that is inside your soul. And it is up to you to find peace with yourself. They no longer understand that we need to live together. They will take what our ancestors have built and destroy it completely.”
Xi Ghong told me about the Vietnamese in Hong Kong - how they were being treated, but how Vietnamese people were still better off there than in their homeland that was now facing an even bigger battle. Now that the war was over, the battle was just beginning for all the families who were left homeless, for all those with no food, without hope. It was as bleak as it had ever been, even during the days of war.
“The clouds are dark over Vietnam. The storm is far from over,” said Xi Ghong, as he slowly got up from his chair, the empty glass beside him. “Sleep now, Fu Yun. You have today learnt much, but there is more for you to learn that does not involve me.”
The bottle, almost empty, was precariously placed on the edge of the table, next to Xi Ghong’s chair. Xi Ghong staggered to join Mei-Lee. I picked up the bottle, took it back to its place, washed the glass and went to bed.
My thoughts that night were full of the poor Vietnamese people, crammed into boats with the sole intention of finding a life better than the one in their homeland. The fact that so many died on the seas trying to escape the despair in their own country, the fact that they were not accepted anywhere else, the fact that so many would be repatriated meant nothing to these people – it was worth the risk. I slowly fell into a restless sleep.
The next morning was sunny and I was in a rush to get to Cao Ping and talk with her. She would feel as much pain as I did from the story. Mei-Lee was already up, cooking dumplings and eggs for Xi Ghong and me. I was nervous, excited, but I knew that I should not show these emotions to either Mei-Lee or Xi Ghong. I tried hard to eat normally, despite my racing heart.
“You are always so excited Fu Yun,” said Xi Ghong. He had not even looked at me, yet he could sense it.
I looked over at him, and saw in his eyes that he knew what I wanted to do. I also knew that I had his blessing.
“Go to Cao Ping. Do not be late for school, and work hard. I want to see you fulfil your proper destiny.”
Xi Ghong almost managed a smile. What he had told me had given me a taste of something to come, and some more direction. I gathered my sports gear, ready for the Wednesday afternoon, and my school bag, and ran out of the apartment, down the stairs and into the heart of Chinatown. I knew my first big goal in life had arrived.
Even at the age of ten, I still could not get used to the way everybody would look at me. A Caucasian exile in a Chinese world. I walked to the fruit stand, bought a mango and from the small store next door, a can of Oolong tea, and walked towards Cao Ping’s apartment. I hid out of sight, watching the front door for her to appear. Usually she would head over to the bus stop at 7 AM, and we knew each other’s habits so well.
I did not need to look for the time, as the door to her apartment block opened – I knew it was her. I waited for a few seconds before coming out of my hiding place, scared that her father may see me.
“Why are you here? What has happened?” she asked.
I started talking to her about what Xi Ghong had told me about Vietnam on the way to school and said that we had to do something.
“You are impulsive Fu Yun. Let us think it over together.”
“But we have to do something to help these poor people. They have done nothing and are run over by the weapons of foreigners. This is not fair.”
Cao Ping smiled, a warm smile that would always calm me down. Somehow my excitement immediately slowed to a reasonable level, and my thoughts once again became less impulsive. Cao Ping was right – I was very impulsive.
At lunchtime that day, we headed out of the school grounds, and to a small market where we could get some noodle soup. Sitting opposite me, I recognised just how beautiful she was, and smiled across at her. She must have known what I was thinking, as she flushed a little.“We have to do something to help the Vietnamese, Fu Yun,” she said. I beamed – she had been thinking over what I had said and had reached the same conclusion as me.
At school that afternoon, I could see that she was planning everything in her mind, but the teacher saw she was not concentrating, and scolded her. This did not seem to have any effect on Cao Ping and she made her plans to help as many Vietnamese refugees as possible. This lack of concentration from the star pupil incensed our teacher, and he punished Cao Ping for the first time ever, hitting her more than just a couple of times with a short bamboo cane, and not gently either.
On the way home from school, Cao Ping did not seem to mind despite the obvious tingling in her hands, and had an idea which we talked about. Her father had some contacts in Hong Kong, and so maybe he could get the two of us over there so we could get into the camps and work there.
“I don’t think your father will be very happy for us to go together,” I said.
Cao Ping smiled. She knew that she would have a tough time in persuading her parents that she should go, but if she were to mention my name, it would be an impossible task.
“We will have to find our way there separately, and meet in Hong Kong,” she suggested.
The bus took us back to Chinatown and Cao Ping got off at her stop. Her father was waiting for her, for the first time that I could remember. He gave me a look that almost made me cower, and took Cao Ping by the hand, marching swiftly to their apartment.
The next morning I waited for Cao Ping as usual, but she did not turn up on time for the bus and so I headed to school alone. When I got there, Cao Ping was already there.
“I will not be coming to school by bus any longer Fu Yun,” she told me. “My father will drive me here and pick me up as soon as school is finished.”
“Why?”
“Because the teacher told my parents I was not concentrating in class. They say it is all your influence. I told them that we had talked about helping the Vietnamese in Hong Kong and they said…”
Cao Ping broke off, sobbing.
“They said that I should take more care of my school work and of my parents than I should of the Vietnamese. They said…it is your fault. They are blaming you for it.”
That came as no surprise to me.
“Fu Yun, they don’t want us to be together doing anything. I think they will take me away from this school.”
I was stunned. Deep inside my heart I knew that this day was bound to come at some stage, but in my eternally optimistic state, I decided to ignore the fears and hope that it would not happen. My world crashed around me, the only thing that really kept me going, the only person in the school who understood me, who accepted me, was now being forced out of my life – just like in my nightmare.
I made myself calm down, as I knew it was futile to do what my heart said – there was no way in the world I was going to be able to directly affect Cao Ping’s parents decision. There was only one thing for me to do – I would have to talk with Xi Ghong.
I sat there, watching Cao Ping cry, and I gave her my pack of tissues, which swiftly became sodden with the mix of her tears and the morning rain. If only I could do something to make her smile once more, but I felt just as bad as she did, and my optimism at this point was dented to the point of being completely broken.
“Xi Ghong will know what to do, Cao Ping. His advice is always wise. He will point us in the right direction.”
Cao Ping almost smiled, but the tears kept on streaming down her face. We headed to class, about as despondent as we had ever been. I held Cao Ping’s hand and looked into her eyes, my own eyes telling her that everything would work out, hardly believing it myself. And then I said it:
“I love you Cao Ping. Nothing will take us from each other. Where you go, I will always be with you.”
Cao Ping threw herself around me, and we held each other tight, drawing stares from the other kids who were just arriving, and heading into the classrooms themselves.
Teacher ordered us to sit apart during class, and it was obvious where that command had come from. We both knew that any argument would only make matters worse, and so we complied. When we thought that teacher was not looking, we glanced at each other, the smile in the eye obvious only to ourselves – we would get over this hurdle and be stronger for it.
At the end of the school day, Cao Ping left to be greeted by her father. I stayed back and watched as she tried to smile at her father. It must have been so hard for her, knowing that her parents wanted a boy more than anything, and having all the pressure to perform well at school.
I wondered if I was worthy of having her as a friend, but left this thought as quickly as it came – I did not want to go down that road. Instead of going back to the apartment immediately, I went to buy some flowers for Mei-Lee – it was her birthday, and I wanted to make her happy. I too was unwanted in a way, but I wanted to make her smile all the same.
I had saved a few dollars and bought as beautiful a bouquet as I could afford, whilst leaving myself enough money for some sarsaparilla. I took both the can of soda and the bunch of flowers with me back to the apartment, and was stunned for the second time that day. When I arrived back in the apartment, no one was there. Xi Ghong was almost always there when I arrived back from school and Mei-Lee hardly left the apartment at all – she had been in ill health for some time.
I arranged the bouquet in a vase, and placed it on the table in the main room, so that as soon as they returned, Mei-Lee would see her flowers, and went to my room to do my homework and drink my sarsaparilla. I felt a real lack of motivation, even though I knew that I would have to work twice as hard to achieve the grades expected of me. I had made great strides in mathematics, thanks to Cao Ping and her patient explanations, but still was behind in science.
When I had finished all my work, it was dark and there was still no sign of Xi Ghong and Mei-Lee. I decided that I was going to cook something special for the two of them, and took ten dollars from the jar where Mei-Lee would keep her food money. I knew that I was trusted, and they kept this hiding place for money no secret from me.
In the market I bought some Chinese broccoli, some carrots, garlic and ginger, and headed over to the fish market. There was a commotion there, as usual, but I noticed a fish for sale that I had never seen before. I went to the stallholder and asked what it was. He had seen me with Mei-Lee many times and was not surprised when I spoke with him in Chinese.
“Come from Australia – Red Snapper. Very good fish to cook.”
Although it was expensive, I thought that Mei-Lee and Xi Ghong would forgive me – after all, it was her birthday – and so I bought it.
I stopped to buy some lemons and then started to walk back to the apartment. Cao Ping suddenly appeared in front of me, her father two paces behind her. I froze – I had absolutely no idea what to do. I knew I couldn’t talk with her, but my legs just would not move any further.
“Luo Xian Sheng hao,” I addressed her father, when he saw me, and nodded my head. Cao Ping grinned a manic grin, but made sure her father did not see it. Somehow I managed to keep a straight face. Cao Ping’s father acknowledged my greeting with a nod, but nothing more, then turned to Cao Ping and led her off in another direction.
By the time I got home, Xi Ghong and Mei-Lee were back, Mei-Lee was smelling the flowers, and when I walked in and announced that I was cooking dinner, even Xi Ghong smiled. Over dinner, I looked over at Xi Ghong, who appeared curiously contented. I was intrigued – something was going on that I did not know about, and I was bursting with questions, but ate the fish and rice in silence. Mei-Lee was eating her red snapper with a vigour I had not seen recently, and that told me that she was enjoying it. When I had cleared the bowls away, I poured Xi Ghong his glass of Scotch and handed it to him.
“You are a good child, Fu Yun,” he said. “Today you made Mei-Lee very happy. You are a good cook – you have learned well.”
“I know she does a lot for me, and on her birthday I am glad to show her that I appreciate everything.” I tried to hide my surprise at the compliment – Xi Ghong had never made that kind of expression towards me before.
Xi Ghong leant towards me, and gave me a knowing smile.
“The Vietnamese need your help,” he said.
“I will go to Hong Kong – I want to do everything I can, especially now.”
“You think your hope has disappeared, but just be strong. Life teaches us that we must take bad times, so that we can appreciate the good.”
“I always appreciated Cao Ping. I don’t understand why her father is so intolerant of us being friends.”
“Long story. Not going to talk about it now.”
I sighed. I wanted to understand at least why my one and only true friend was no longer allowed to even talk with me. The one thing that I treasured above everything else in the world had been taken from me. I was not really hearing what Xi Ghong was saying, and certainly did not follow any of his implications until he waved his glass in my direction, for me to give him a refill.
“Luo Xian Sheng has seen that maybe his actions were a little harsh. It is a wise man who will listen to all arguments before making a decision. You and Cao Ping will be able to go to Hong Kong together.”
Xi Ghong always was my absolute hero, despite the fact that he would beat me occasionally. He had earned the respect of so many people in our neighbourhood, and when he talked, his words were accepted as being full of wisdom and intelligence. He spoke with authority and although I never fully understood just what his role was in the Chinese community in Singapore, I did know that he met with a lot of people. And still he would find time for me, to bring me up in the way he had promised my father many years before.
What had he said to change Cao Ping’s father’s mind? Had he pulled a few strings? There were so many questions running through my mind and the broadest smile possible on my face. The Chinese try not to show too much emotion, either happiness or sadness, but this was one thing that I just could not master. Xi Ghong always knew how I felt – to him I was an open book.
“Luo Xian Sheng just needed to know the background information. He was not aware that I had given you the seed for the idea. You grew it, and it is commendable that you are so eager to assist those who are suffering from the pains of the war. I suggested that Luo Xian Sheng accompany you to Hong Kong to see for himself that your heart is pure and also to give his assistance.
“You will fly next week – I have arranged the flights and you will stay with Mei-Lee’s brother in Kowloon.”
I took some time to take in all this information. Of course I was overjoyed that Cao Ping and I could spend time together but I had no idea what to make of the fact that also her father was joining us. He could exert his fatherly influence there where I could have no chance of relying on Xi Ghong’s help.
And Mei-Lee’s brother? I had never known that she even had a brother until Xi Ghong told me I was staying with him.
“Where will Cao Ping and Luo Xian Sheng stay?” I asked
“They will be also in Kowloon – Luo Xian Sheng has family contacts there. You will see Cao Ping during the day. After you have finished your work, you will go back to Mei-Lee’s brother. You will not mix with the others, you will not stay behind to work longer hours. You disobey my orders and you will be punished. Luo Xian Sheng will keep an eye on you and Cao Ping. If there is any trouble, he will bring her back straight away. That is the agreement.”
Although I wanted to be happy with this turnaround in fortunes, I was still wary of Cao Ping’s father. He bore a grudge against me, and Xi Ghong would not tell me what it was.
“Xi Ghong, how do you know everything? Even things I do not tell you?”
“There are no secrets that you can keep from me Fu Yun. I know your spirit, and I hear the words that come to me. There are a lot of people keeping an eye open for you – you are different to us Chinese, yet you are one of us. But people are still wary of you, and do not fully trust you. You have to work twice as hard to achieve what a Chinese can do. One day though Fu Yun, you will achieve your goal. You will make good your honour to Mei-Lee and myself.”
The next morning I packed my schoolbooks and my football gear and headed for the school bus. Cao Ping was brought by her mother, who gave her a warning frown when she left. She was under strict instructions to behave and to concentrate on her schoolwork. This was the last week before the holidays, and we were to have some final tests today, before sports.
It was also the final of the school’s football competition, our school being pitted against the champions of the last two years, Orchard Road School. Cao Ping was going to be allowed to watch the game, but only under her father’s supervision, and she was both nervous and excited about it.
“You will win today and make Xi Ghong very happy,” she said. I knew that she would also be very happy and proud, if we succeeded.
I smiled at her, and our eyes met. Cao Ping’s dark brown eyes sparkled like I had not known them to. They told me that everything I felt for her was mirrored. I could see that she wanted to ask me about what I had said to her the previous day. Looking back, at the tender age of ten, how could we have known that we loved each other? I felt the warmth of her smile and resolved to win the football match for her.
But before the fun, there is always the pain. The science test that I had worked hard for was very difficult. Even Cao Ping struggled on some of the questions. I knew that I would be lucky to get a pass, and there was not one pupil who left the room thinking he or she had done well.
“That was not a good test for you Fu Yun. I think someone knew your weaknesses and put those questions in.”
“Many of us were struggling there. I hope I have done enough to make it through.”
For lunch, we went to the food market, where Cao Ping bought me a noodle soup, and she sat there watching me, playing with her beef noodles, hardly touching them.
“What are you thinking about?” I asked, slurping on my hot soup.
Cao Ping looked over at me, and again my heart jumped as her eyes sparkled.
“You said that you love me.”
“I do. You bring happiness to my heart that no one else could ever bring. I will play the match today for you. If I score a goal, it will be you who scores it. If we win the match, it will be you who gets the medal. You make everything possible, you give me the reason to fight.”
“I know you will win the football today, I know you have passed the test, I know you can do anything.”
She touched her jade monkey that was hanging around her neck.
“I still remember when we got these from Xi Ghong,” she said. “I will always treasure it. It is our symbol.”
I put my hand to my own chain, and felt the calming force of the jade monkey. It gave me a great deal of security and I knew that it meant as much to Cao Ping as it did to me.
Getting ready for the football game, the teacher was looking nervous – he knew that we wanted to win so much, yet we were playing against one of the only teams to have beaten us during the season. Having lost two games in a season meant we finished third in the league and made it to the semi-finals. Having overcome the second-placed team relatively comfortably, we now had to play against the best team on the Singaporean peninsular. I was trying my hardest to keep calm and relaxed, but failing miserably. I heard the teacher talking, but no words made it to my sub-conscious.
The game was one full of defence, and when Orchard Road got a penalty early in the second half, it looked all over for us. The teacher looked despondent, as the opponent stepped up to take the penalty. Thankfully for us, he hit the ball straight at our keeper who hadn’t even moved, and it bounced out to one of our defenders, who pumped the ball up field.
I seemed to be having a very off day, and the Orchard Road defenders swiftly dealt with all my runs. It seemed like anything I tried was doomed for failure, and it was tough not to let my head drop, and to keep on fighting. Many of the Orchard Road players were almost as big as I was, and a few others were a lot faster. But the thing was that our team just did not give up.
With just two minutes remaining and the game still without a goal, our midfielder passed the ball straight in between two of Orchard Road’s defenders. Both looked at each other to clear the ball away, and I used this lapse in their concentration to steal the ball and, whilst heading towards the corner flag, I took a shot. At the same time, I fell over, and when I looked towards the goal, I saw nothing except the back of the net rippling, the ball inside it. I heard gasps, and then applause and cheers as what happened hit home.
Teacher looked as though he could not believe what he had just witnessed. I looked over at Cao Ping, her father sitting next to her, and Xi Ghong a little further along the line of people. He nodded at me, and this was as close to a “congratulations” as I would get from him there. One year previously I had seen some of the goals from the World Cup in Argentina, and how they would celebrate when they scored. Chinese culture did not permit such outbursts, and so I suppressed my happiness, but how I wanted to run over to Cao Ping and dance to celebrate.
The final two minutes seemed to last forever, but when the whistle blew, there was much relief and celebration. Even the head teacher, Doctor Chao went around thanking everyone for their support and for turning up. He was the one who went up to receive the trophy from the Singapore Education Council. I thought that was very strange, as that was the only game he had turned up to watch.
I looked over at Cao Ping, to see her being led away by her father – the game was over, so was her involvement. She had been allowed to watch the game, and had seen the goal. That was her allotted time, and now her father took her home. Despite the elation of the victory I was sad and very disappointed; I wanted to talk with her, but I knew that she would be proud of me. Xi Ghong came over to me, leaving just enough space between us so as not to show affection, but his eyes glowed.
“You have done more than you know today Fu Yun,” he told me. “There are a lot of people who will benefit from this, and Yishun school’s reputation across Singapore will rise.”
I wondered if anybody’s attitudes would change towards me – if anyone would start to accept me a little more, but I doubted it. I was almost accustomed to the treatment I was getting from the other kids, but I still resented it in a way. It would take me a long time to truly understand it – if at all - but I had no choice but to accept it. It would be a nice change if I was to be treated better by the others, but attitudes are hard to adapt, and both Xi Ghong and Cao Ping would always be able to calm me down and make me see the other side of the story.
“I am glad that you were there today Xi Ghong,” I said. Xi Ghong did not react at all to that comment, in fact he did not show whether or not he had heard it, but I know he did.
Singapore is a peninsular that loves football and betting, and the two are often combined with a passion that many outside of Asia just cannot comprehend. A couple of days after the game I learnt that our trainer and head teacher had had a lot of money riding on the games, and that both had won a lot of cash with the bookmakers.
I was walking along the corridor next to the head teacher’s office, and our trainer was there. They were discussing the game, and so I slowed down to listen – it was hard not to! I overheard the sum of what they had earned via their betting, and it amounted to over one million Singapore dollars. Their discussion now descended upon how much they were going to bet on Yishun School in the next season.
I felt disgust that the teachers from our school could personally profit from the school success without sharing their fortune. The fact that the head teacher had accepted the trophy without having once attended a game during the normal season just did not seem fair to me. But now I was faced with the dilemma of what to do. I could easily tell Xi Ghong, but what would he say to me? Would he tell me just to ignore it all? Cao Ping seemed like the logical person, but we did not have much time together, and when we did, it was always under surveillance.
I decided to tell Xi Ghong, knowing that I could be risking my trip to Hong Kong. But my conscience would not allow this to go unchallenged. That evening, after Mei-Lee had cooked us some garlic pork with noodle, Xi Ghong seemed troubled.
“Once again, Fu Yun, you have something on your mind.”
I could not believe it – I had told no one about what I had heard at the school. But I stayed quiet for the moment.
“What you hear is not always good to know. You should not listen to these people – they are bad, but our world is not always full of people solely with good in their heart. There are people who will gladly profit from any situation and some who help them to profit, knowingly or not.”
This was the first time that I had seen the darker side of Singapore, and Xi Ghong warned me that it was a taste of things to come.
Before I went to bed that night, Xi Ghong talked to me about Hong Kong.
“There are a lot of similarities between Singapore and Hong Kong, but also a lot of differences. At heart, we are all Chinese yet we are different in many ways. You will see a lot of things there that will disturb you and you will learn much that will shape your days to come. I know that what you want is to help the Vietnamese there, and your heart is full of good intentions. Do not let yourself be led astray. Do not let bad influences deter you from your path.”
“Why are people so motivated by money?” I asked.
“You will one day see for yourself why.” Another cryptic answer from Xi Ghong. Sometimes I wondered why he would occasionally give me a straight answer, and many other times he would leave everything a mystery.
I knew better than to push Xi Ghong any further, and so I left it. I assumed that as Xi Ghong had been right on most things in the past, this too would turn out to be true.
In the run up to visiting Hong Kong, I was feeling the excitement fill me from head to toe. I was buzzing, and this would be my very first adventure, my first time away from Singapore without Xi Ghong and Mei-Lee. I would be able to spend some time with Cao Ping. But there was one day left before our trip to Hong Kong, and this day filled me with trepidation – it was the day that we were to receive the results of our examination. In truth, I was dreading receiving the final results.
When I met Cao Ping at school, there was no other talk than the exams. There was a rumour being spread that even Cao Ping had failed, but there was a little resentment in the class that she talked with the Yang Gway Tzr, and no one really believed the talk.
Science was the first lesson of the morning, and so we did not have long to wait. The teacher entered the classroom with an unusually stern look upon her face.
“I am disappointed in this class,” she said. Not so much as a “Good Morning” to us. “Many of you have less than satisfactory results on this, and so you will be retaking this next week. Those who do not return next week will not be welcome back in school next year.”
My stomach turned as the teacher said this. I was fearing the worst, and even when I looked over at Cao Ping, who was once again sitting next to me, she too seemed very nervous. I was certain that as one of the top students, she would have nothing to fear personally, but I knew how much it meant to her for us to go to Hong Kong together, and if I failed, then there was no way I could go. Cao Ping looked at me, tried to smile and give me encouragement, but I could see the uncertainty in her eyes.
Teacher handed Cao Ping her test paper, and Cao Ping, nervously, turned the page to the result. A pass. And a good pass at that. She looked very surprised.
Not for the first time, my paper was the last to be returned. I could not look – my fingers just could not turn the page. I did not need to ask Cao Ping – just my look was sufficient for her to know what I wanted.
Cao Ping took my paper, and opened it up. Her look told me that our trip to Hong Kong was safe.
“How did you manage that Fu Yun?”
I was still in shock, and although I could see the pass mark on the paper, and I heard the words that Cao Ping said, I was speechless. Not only had I passed, I had actually got the best score of all twenty students in class.
“Fu Yun?” Cao Ping repeated. She had the widest smile on her face.
Finally I regained my composition and found a way to talk.
“All of it was your help Cao Ping. You taught me everything there.”
“But your score is higher than mine. The questions were as hard as they could be. And you made it. I am so proud of you.”
I smiled almost as broadly as Cao Ping herself.
The rest of the day was almost as if I spent it in a dream – I remember lunch with Cao Ping, but nothing more. When I got home in the evening, I helped Mei-Lee with the dinner, and waited for Xi Ghong to return. If Mei-Lee knew about my science test result, she did not let on, and I wanted to tell both her and Xi Ghong at the same time.
Just before we had our evening meal ready, Xi Ghong arrived, carrying a small package. He placed it on the table, at my place. Did Xi Ghong know about my test already?
“Tomorrow Fu Yun, you will leave Mei-Lee and myself. It will be your first adventure and I know you will achieve much. You will make a lot of people happy with your help. This book will teach you much about Vietnam and her people.”
He handed me the parcel and I unwrapped it very carefully, as I had been taught. In the past I would unwrap parcels impatiently, and would always be told not to rush it. This time, I could see Xi Ghong smiling at me, knowing that he had indeed instilled me with at least a little patience, although I am sure that both he and Mei-Lee knew I would never have much of it.
Inside the front cover, Xi Ghong wrote, “For Fu Yun, may your spirit fly far”. I knew that my spirit needed to travel, and Xi Ghong was helping me in my first flight.
“Xi Ghong, we got the results of our science test today,” I told him.
“Yes Fu Yun. Today was a big day for you.”
“You have heard already?”
“No.”
“I came top of the class.”
Mei-Lee smiled; Xi Ghong looked almost in wonder and disbelief.
“You have worked hard Fu Yun.”
“Without Cao Ping, I would have failed. She is the one who made this result.”
“Luo Xian Sheng will know this,” Xi Ghong told me.
I could not sleep that night – I was so excited about the trip, and when Xi Ghong had retired to bed, I turned my light on and started reading through the book on Vietnamese history. I was surprised to learn about it’s colonial past, and the many times Vietnam had been conquered over the centuries, about the array and the depth of culture, and of the resilience of the people. I vowed to learn much more whenever I could. I was amazed at the amount of history and culture the Vietnamese had, and wondered why Xi Ghong told me nothing of it until now.
When I finally fell asleep, my dreams were wild and vivid, but none of them could prepare me for what was ahead.
